This is a story a friend recently shared with me about being “nearly perfectly happy”!
This is how her story went…”One morning I was walking my young son to school. Not something I did very often. Usually I was too busy getting myself and his siblings ready because I often sleep later than I plan to. But this morning, I made time and we were walking together, just the two of us. About halfway there, my young son of seven, reached up and took hold of my hand, in an uninhibited way, that I knew wouldn’t last forever.
How many twelve-year-old boys do you see walking hand in hand with their moms on their way to school? So I squeezed his hand, felt the rays of sun fall blissfully upon my face, and told him I loved him. In that moment I was nearly perfectly happy. Nearly.
Then a thought came into my mind; the voice sounded a lot like my own voice, but meaner…it was my destructive inner negative voice which had been with me for so long. It was so deeply intgrated into who I thought I was, that I hardly noticed “her” anymore!
This is what the jerk in my head said: ‘Sooo, you’re walking him to school and putting on your mother of the year act today. What about yesterday and the day before that? You hardly ever walk him to school. He’s probably holding your hand because he’s so desperate for the love and attention you haven’t been showing him.”
My bubble burst and even the smiling face of this contented child could not bring it back! I started to tell myself what a sorry excuse for a mom, I was!
Enter Moment of Clarity!!!
An alarm suddenly went off inside my head and in burst this stream of truth…you are loving him and caring for him. He’s well fed, perfectly happy, and on time for school. Do not rob yourself of this moment’s joy because of what you failed to do yesterday or what you fear you may not do tomorrow.
I started to realize how many times I’d done something good, sweet, or even awesome, while beating myself up for all the times I hadn’t been perfect. My inner voice ws finally exposed for the destructive harpy that she was.
Why had I been listening to her for all this time? How harmful, how disrespectful to myself to badger myself with such incrimination.
As I said goodbye to Jay and watched him confidently enter his school, my mind started to shift. My life could not go on like this. There had to be a way to enjoy these moments, to simply be happy without beating myself up for all my failures.
The internal nagging had to stop. I needed to send my negative voice packing and replace it with something, and fast, before it took over completely!
That’s when it hit me: Drops of Awesomeness! Every time you do something good, something kind, something productive, it’s a Drop in your Bucket of Awesome.
You don’t lose Drops for every misstep. You can only build. You can only fill.
I walked Jay to school. Bam! A Drop of Awesome! I fed him fruit with breakfast. Drop of Awesome! I told him I loved him. Drop of Awesome!
All day long I chanted those words in my head.
I swept the kitchen floor instead of stepping over the crumbs for the fiftieth time. Drop of Awesome! I texted my troubled friend to say I was thinking about her. Drop of Awesome!
I had an unproductive, critical thought about one of my kids, but I brushed it away and replaced it with love. Drop of Awesome!
When I started thinking about my life in terms of adding these little Drops of Awesome for every tiny act of good, I found that I was doing more and more of them because it’s a lot more fun to do good when you’re rewarded with joy, rather than being punished with guilt for every failure in your past.
By the end of the day, I realized something important. If I was spending time with my kids, really listening to each of them with attention, at least fifteen minutes a day, then I was a good listener, even if I had multi-tasked while they were talking at other times. And it felt really good to be that person.
As I added up these Drops of Awesome, I found that in those moments, I actually became the person I had always wanted to be. Drops of Awesome is really about allowing yourself to feel joy and to be proud of your small victories. This builds momentum and makes you want more Drops in your bucket. Because of the positive feedback you experience, you are willing to do more, and each tiny step brings you closer to achieving your goals.”
This friend is Kathryn Thompsom and I found her published journal at Shared Blessings in Kilauea, Kauai!
I’d like to extend a big MAHALO to Shared Blessings and to whoever dropped off Kathryn Thompson’s ” You’re More Awesome Than You Think Journal” and of course to Kathryn Thompson, herself, for creating it and giving herself the opportunity to let her own cheerleader shine through for all of us to see and learn from.
All Credits go to: Kathryn Thompson for creating the Drops of Awesome Journal!
Kathryn Thompson lives in the Seattle suburbs with her computer genius husband and three young kids. You can follow her adventures at DaringYoungMom.com.
Her work is published by familius.com ~a book publisher dedicated to helping families be happy.
“The most important work you ever do will be within the walls of your own home.”